School..Family and a Tiger Sanctuary

I have found an e-mail place but once again I have limited time. I am heading into the mountains today with Nallasivan and his colleauge. I travelled Nallasivans school in the village (20% of the students are orphans) I met a Canadian and English girl who were working at the orphanage nearby so I went and visited them as well. Nallasivan's staff put on a welcoming ceremony and I was the ambassador for their Green movement. I got to plant some trees in the court yard. I am going to try and upload the pictures of the ashram orphanage and me doing some quick hair-cuts for some of the girls: the one's name was Sashee..very sweet.

I spent yesterday in Meena's kitchen learning how to cook and she was also filling me ino some secret ingredients that are not so secret in India but until now have remained a mystery to me...like why the tea tastes so much better here than at home!

She also took me through the traditional Hindi wedding and the reasons behind some of the reception. We ended the day with a lesson of saree dressing. I think I am close to being able to dress myself. Vydyha looked on and giggled but she told me I looked very nice. It is a real treat to be dressed and have your hair done with jewels and flowers.

I going back to the village and visiting water dam area. Nallasivan is trying to get special permission to have me enter a certain area. Okay, so the areas we were in was Tiger Sanctuary..unfortunately ( fortunately?) no tiger sitings. But two different species of monkeys..pretty cute in my books. As well we ended up hitting one of the waterfalls and went for a bath. This entailed me undressing in front of an audience...if you recall the male female ratios here, this was no different..22 men, 2 women ( that two is including me!) They

had a guard stand nearby and clear the rest of the men out of the waterfall. I stood in my sarong while the onlookers stared and stared and stared ( Kit that was for you..I thought you might be missing those horrible TV commercials haha)

For a country that is very particular about seeing legs and shoulders of a woman, this was quite the experience. But very refreshing..if not a whole lot revealing.

The Royal Treatment

So I was met at the airport by teachers from Madurai. they took teh The Royal Court Hotel and I rested from my days journey. I was met the next morning and taken to my room to be dressed. Lakshimi had brought a sari and jewellry and Jasmine for my hair..as well as the bhindi and I was magically turned into an Indian woman. I felt very beautiful. Lakshima and her son Vidya and Robert another teacher and a friend took me throughout Mandurai..the best day in India yet.

Our first stop was teh famous Sri Meenakshi Temple.....HUGE. I was very appreciative to have the guidance. However I also become a site seeign attraction... western woman dressed in saree, with mendhi hands and after a special pooja ceremony, completely garlanded with wedding garlands from Meenakshi... so I was surrounded by people from Kerala who wanted to know who I had married...not married just feeling like a Hindu princess.

I took pictures with some of the ladies adn one of a little girl that was simply beautiful.

We headed up the mountain to a temple that had water flowing from the depths for over 3000 years...I was again was given a special pooja ceremony and taken down into the specail bathing area..where I stepped in and joined the rest being blessed by the water but looking slightly like coralled animals. It was brilliant, Vydia, Lakshima and me were first to dip in and splash. We then finsihed with a little picnic right in the temple of rice wrapped in banana leaf and some very sweet treats. I was blessed with the ash and garlands and then we finished our day with a stop at a coffee shop and walk through of a Mahatma Ghandi memorial... all in all a very Hindu day the left me in awe. I did not have enough gratitude for the kindess of my hosts...I was heartbroken to see them leave. It was a very special day.

t

Pimpin' a ride

Soooo I am on my own and I was transferring to to get to Madurai. Option A wait in the airport for 5 hours. Option B get harrrassed by a taxi driver to let him take me around the city for free...nothing in India is free. So we negotitated and he took me back to his rattle trap car and I started thinking..what did I agree too? Wellt eh arragnemetn was five stores that I had to go into..he would get paid 200 Rs a store for bringing me.....and I would see Bangalore. As he drove me down some back alley and through some deserted streets the only thing goign through my head was: missing tourist in Banglore. He grabbed my hand and pinched my fingers and laughed. He then looked at me and said 2 chidst..??? two chidst You will have two children hahah. The first store we went to a took his keys and a taxi liscence and went in and had masala tea with some beautifil Kashmir men. I came out of the store and he said: you are very smart lady and I thought: I don't think my mother would think that right now:)

I went to the stores and visited with the Kashmir men and learned many interesting things.... my driver took meout for lunch and said I will pay if you stay one more day...I laughed and said takeme back to the airport please....free taxi, free lunch free tea and a free tour of the city..with only one or two panic atacks.. all is well and I am on my way to Madurai

t

Mendhi and Old Delhi

If you have ever watched the Amazing Race you will know the day that Kit and I had shopping. Our taxi driver got lost and we ended up on teh opposite ened of where we wanted to be and ended up walking through the some of the streets of old Delhi. It put your senses to the test between watching where your footing, watching your bag and the action and odours.. you found your head spinning. We ended up grabbing a bicycle rickshaw and it was much nicer. We ended our day with mendhi... we negotiated the price, got the henna on our hands and the ladies cahnged their price. It is the first time that we have been out and out lied to... not bad for a one month stay in India. The henna goes on and must stay on your skin for one hour. Then you have to scrape it off and not wach for one evening. The henna dies your skin an orange color that keeps getting darker. It is a chocolate brown color right now and will last a couple of weeks. It is wedding henna. Brides get it done on their hands and feet before they get married.

Love and Marriage

More picture of the Taj Mahal’s detailed carvings and marble work..and some info on Love and Marriage in India

So my investigation into love marriages and arranged marriages continues. Furthuring my interest Kuldeep answered many questions that I was curious about. When getting married, there is a dowry that the bride’s family needs to pay. It is usually all of the household items and money, dependant on the wealth of the family. The bride will also pay for the ceremony ( which can be as long as 5 days). It is tradition that the brides aunt and uncle will give the couple a gift as well…usually 20,000 to 50, 000 Rs This is the traditional sense. Kuldeep to0ld me that he and many others do not always expect a dowry and the money from the aunt and uncle but it is the way.
He also told me that in India it is based on a joint family tradition. The brothers will stay together in living arrangements with their mother and father while the daught is expected to move in with her husband’s family and brothers. He was surprised that Canadians live independent of their families in many cases. He said that the other families take care of the children and duties in a communal sense. How old? Well for women 20-25, for men 25, 30 to 40. The one thing that is essential is that child brides have been outlawed and men are not allowed to marry before 25.
I asked him if he got to meet his wife prior to marrying him and he laughed and said yes…but this is not the traditional way The men and women that have love marriages will receive no support from their families or friends..he was very clear that they would be isolated and not supported.. He said these marriages do not often last. He told me that to see the young couples out who are not married and in his words “making fun” of the traditions of India were very disrespectful. I was a little sheepish in the idea that I could not tell the difference between the married and unmarried couples. He noted a few in the places we were…I asked about dating and he said that it is not approved of but media and movies are eroding the traditional values.
I have seen this in the youth going to discos in the hotel. It is a shock to see anyone’s legs here, westerners and Indian people included. I have been here a short time and I will catch myself staring. So, to see music videos and young women in short skirt is not fashion dress that is approved of here. And dating before marriage is a hidden secret and does not have the approval of the majority.
Big or small it is okay to show your belly (except in Haryana and Punjab) but to show your legs is obscene.
As for infidelity, if it does happen it is denied profusely. Arranged marriages are defended and believed to work better than love marriages. But it is questionable when one sees t-shirts that say MBA: married but available and many people of all ages are on love match sites in the internet places and there are many people seeking connections with westerners

In my own experience I have had a few seeking my affections, some more persistent than others. But the mother intervened on my behalf: she told him that I was the moon and he was the cloud and the cloud could not talk to the moon. She told him to wish me a happy journey from her and from him and to let me be. It was very sweet way of putting it. I told Rufas that if I was the moon then he must be my sun :)

...times are changing and many are resisting the change, but the times just keep changing,
t

Taj Mahal

Taj Mahal

I traveled to Agra yesterday and there is not enough words to detail the grandness and beauty of the Taj Mahal. I will post some pictures..but even then it does not capture the feel of the place. So with requests, I will post three pics..the one with the back of my head so that my sister can pretend that it is her. One for my fellow yogis who won’t laugh at me when everyone else is haha! And of course the one that left me breathless: A group of school children in bright red uniforms running in between the mosque and the Taj Mahal. And the last one is the interesting thing about India: I go to take a picture of the Taj Mahal and the Indians want a picture of me...these were my new friends haha!

The beauty and the sadness of the Taj Mahal is wrapped in its story. A tribute to his wife, the emperor had many workers build the white marble structure. With devotion and love it was builton the bloodshed of many workers. After the artistry was complete the Emperor had the thumbs cut off of the men who constructed the beautiful symmetrical masterpiece so that they would never be able to copy the artistry anywhere else. It did not end there… he had most of the labourers killed so they could not replicate anything from the structure.
Once the white marble Taj was built he intended to put a black mirror image across the river. This did not happen. He started the outline and before any brick was laid he was imprisoned by his son in the fort facing the Taj Mahal. It is here he was imprisoned for the remaining eight years of his life. He had a complete view of his masterpiece and tribute of love…but also his unfulfilled dream.
His son believed he had already spent too much money and to build a black marble Taj Was too extravagant and he was taking too much money away from the people

I visited the fort and veiwed the place of imprisonment but I also saw the area where the golden chain of justice used to be. It is believed that there was a long gold chain that reached down to the common people. Any person could call for justice by shaking the chain and bringing awareness to the emperor of the justice being sought.

I also visted Akbar’s tomb with its 70 foot ceiling that allows an echo to carry out for longer than 5 seconds.

The most memorable things about the trip would be the kindness of my host Kuldeep who walked me through all of the areas while fending off many peddlars of tourist items.

The symmetry and precision of the artistry: large slabs that had perfectly symmetrical carvings.

And of course the drive to Agra: the roads in India are riddled with donkeys, camels and horses pulling carts beside large lorries filled with anything from dead cows and camels to people spilling out and hanging on precariously out the sides of rickshaws or on the back of bikes. Loads of immense size tilted and twisted to fit on too small of transportation. Donkeys next to small cars, right next to fancy jeeps, beside bicycles. It is a shock to the senses with complete and utter disbelief flowing through your veins at every moment of every moment forward in traffic. The only thought being one of wonder at how it all works. And the deafening sound of horns beeping to indicate anything from I want to pass to just simple..I am am right behind you. On the backs of trucks it says please use horn...as if anyone in India needed a reminder to use their horn haha!
I may make it home but it will be after my heart has taken a licking from mini-heart attacks and slight cases to extreme case of whiplash, and with some hearing loss all the while my driver is giggling to himself and singing little tunes completely unphased by the chaotic nature of the road.
Kit and I keep laughing that there are signs everywhere saying lane driving is safe driving and I have yet to see anyone drive in one lane..in fact even when there is no other vehicle the trucks still drive in the middle of the road (however there is rarley, if ever just 20 vehicles...)

It was a long trip there and back...the distance is not long but the traffic is intense...nonetheless well worth every twist and turn on the road.

t

Hosts

Nice hosts and beautiful gifts...they joked about the use of mobile phones but there is no secretary or land line at this school, so it is the only way to have any contact with the world. the lady is the "sweeper" or the janitor of the place. She was so beautiful, I wanted a picture of her smiling..but I have found that there are few Indian people that will smile with their teeth showing. ( will add picture next time)

t

School Visits

Me with the scared nursury students
Outdoor/indoor classrooms
computer room ( no internet)
playground and door ways to classrooms

The first thing that happens is a rest and have tea to recover from our five minute travel over to the school. Secondly, we are escorted to nursury classrooms and computer classrooms. The chirldren are very loud when we first arrive and then they get very very quiet when we step in the room. We talk and take pictures and they sit silent with big eyes. Some of the children are asked to sing and it is very sweet. They sit and stare and then when we leave they burst into giggles. The one teacher said that for some it would be the first time they have seen a white person.

I see the bare essentials in one of the better government schools. The walls have colorful things on them and the children are all dressed in uniform. This is one of the better schools. When we enter an extremely crowded classroom, we are told that one of the teachers is on a 4 month mat leave ( there is no replacement teacher...the children are divided between the other classrooms until the teacher returns). The next school we go to there are 2 women on mat leave and so the classrooms are very full. There are 700 students at the first school and the second school has about 1400... they come in two shifts 7:30-12:30 and 1:30-5:30 The girls come in the morning and the boys come in the second shift.

The toilet and clean drinking water is an issue. The school we see are very lucky, they have water and a few toilets (7 at the first school and 10 at the second) Some of the children that come to these schools do not have any bathrooms at home and will wait to come to school to use the ones there. This is one of the better schools. Some of the schools do not have good water or toilets..and some don't even have a building.

The teachers are stressed for space and they will often hold classes outside. They will take turns (one or two classes outside and then they will switch with another class). They struggle with attendance problems. Children will not come to school if the weather is poor..there is no means of transportation to get them to school.

They asked if school holidays were in the winter ( because they consider this to be our extreme weather time) When they have extreme weather like monsoons and heat..this is when school holidays are. A very different rationale for holding classes.

The schools we visited had very hospitable hosts. We were greeted with beautiful flowers and given shawls as gifts...it was very humbling when observing the limited resources adn struggles of the teachers. The one teacher said...education must come..the buildings will follow. We cannot eliminate poverty if there is no education. But she also said that it is a horrid circle..poverty is the root of limited education.

The computer room had 7 computers and at the second school there were 6. They leave their classroom and come in groups of 3 for a couple of hours a week. A very different type of idea abot technology and expectations.

The school visit was very interesting and at the same time very important for me to realize the needs of some of the teachers we were teaching. I am glad that I had such good hosts.

At the end of the school visits the headmasters gave us beautiful bouquets and wool shawls that were embroidered.

The gifts are quite beautiful..as were the students,

t

Where are the girls?

We were on school visits and this is a poster I took a picture of.. It says a lot about gender equality in India. I read in the newspaper that they are opening orphanages for the girl children to help the depletion of girl children in this country. If you read the caption about 32 million girls do not attend school in India you will note that that is the entire population of Canada out of school.

Some general India notes

Miscellaneous notations

Things I need to write down so that I will not forget them: Living the high class life is knowing that there is going to be a hair dryer in your hotel room the size of a small vacuum that doesn’t really blow any air.

Being in India is knowing that whatever you stepped in... you really really don’t want to look at or even think about getting off your shoe. Especially when a shoe shine person is running after you yelling "dog s**t madam, dog s**t" and Kit is brushing him off and ignoring him( as it says in the travel book this is a ploy to get money....only to realize hours later that he was not trying to wrangle money but insist that she had some green slimeys all over her shoe...quite funny.

Being in India is being in constant conflict with day and night…it is safer during the day to avoid things that you may step in and people are friendlier, and there are more females on the street, however; you can also see what you are stepping and the surrounding garbage that encompasses the water and streets and the pollution that has eaten away at the buildings.

At night, you are consciously side stepping and wondering what the strange oudor is...during the day you can actually see what the strange odour. At night it is beautiful with lights and alleys. During the day the grime is evident in every corner dashed with the brilliance of color from saris and salwar kameez displays on every corner.

In the internet cafes there is always the possibility that something will bite your ankles..mosquitoes, baby spiders or some other unknown assailant like in Kit's case, a mouse running up and down your backpack.

Being in India means that looks don't always count: Look at the state of the hotel reception and divide by 1000 is Kit's calculation in determing the quality of a hotel room for lighting and cleanliness. And sometimes you need to adjust the calculation and divide by 2000.

Being stared at and approached by complete strangers every second step and some will want something and others will just want to talk.

Being in India is wanting to scoop up a child and hold them forever and at the same time wanting to unwrap their arms and run without ever turnign back.

Being in India is getting offered food by strangers and guests when they won't take no for an answer. And finding out the green gook or orange mash is possibly the worst looking and yet the best tasting thing you have ever had in your mouth and the safe plain little doughball is the most disgusting thing to touch your tongue...only India.

Only in India can a person become a vegetarian without realizing it because the veg dishes are more divine than anything else...

Only in India can you love a place so greatly and hate it all at the same time.

There is much more, but these are few notations that needed to be mentioned.
t

Ba'Hai Lotus Temple

Lotus temple that Gulshan, Kit and I visited. You must take your shoes off and check them in, like you would check your coat. You are not allowed to take pictures inside. It was Sunday when we went, there were streams of people filing in to see, and sit.

Inside it was very simple and calming.

Salwar Kameez

A Salwar Kameez is a a pants suit worn by women in Punjab and Haryana ( and all over India) But these participants wanted to see us dressed up. It is funny to wear the traditional clothes. One gets a million compliments and then some finishing bindhi touches with much discussion. Normally an Indian woman will only wear a bindhi, bangles and toe rings if she is married. They made an exception for me and told me that single women can wear very tiny bindhis. It was sweet. However the compliments were needed after the week of questioning. For much of the week I was interrogated about my weight ( I asked if they would inquire this information from an Inidan woman....it was not asked again haha), and "why do Canadian women not use beauty tips?" I think they were curious why I wasn't wearing make-up....Kit found this quite funny. Five men staring at my face and asking where my make-up was! I made a point to not wear bangles and toe rings and put some make-up on for the last day.

However, it opened the door to many questions on why I was not married haha!

And then one of the ladies discussed getting a sari. Sarjeet informed me that Suresh would send me a red sari. I was very excited and told them that the red ones were my favourite...I did not realize that I was once again being teased that I should marry an Indian man. Apparently the red Saris are wedding dresses. I remebered the bride at the Hindi wedding was wearing a red one and then we passed another women when we were at the Lotus Temple that was wearing one with extravagent beaded and mirrored wedding sari. Wedding or no wedding I would love to have a red sari..they are beautiful.

This morning was a little unnerving, as Suresh and the others from Haryana left for home last night. They had called to say good-bye and invite me to see the Golden Temple in the Punjab state. This morning the news was covered with a train bombing on the express train in Haryana. It was on its way to Pakistan. The line it runs is called the friendship express...quite the opposite with up to 68 persons having been killed. It was supposed to improve the the communication and relationship with Packistan. It was terrorist activity, there were many Packistani National Ambassadors on board.

We have since found out that it would not have stopped in Haryana, had it not been on fire from the bomb, and we are quite sure that the men were not on that train. Suresh is going to call the office tonight, so we should no more details later. I have been having a rough time with the whole thing. It is different to watch and hear about bombings in Canada and see the streams of smoke and people. It is much different when you are asking yourself who you might know on the train.

Aside from this sadness, the end of my work time is nearing. We have an evaluation day tomorrow and then I am off to see the Taj Mahal in Agra. It is a full day trip and they are trying to decide who will accompany me. Kit has already been there and is not up for the long drive again. My hosts are insistent that I be accompanied by someone! My Mom and Dad will be happy that there are people here that are more protective than they are!

Upon request from Al Blanke, I interrogate my farming buddies from the northern states. So he was correct in his assumption that the teachers were also farmers. They have planted a lot of wheat, rice and cotton..and all of the crops are looking quite good. As for lentils...well there just wasn't a lot of lentil farmers that could speak English well enough to answer my questions. I will find out about the southern crops in about 2 weeks :)

I fly out of Delhi into Bangalore, and then from Bangalore to Madurai. I will probably hire a car for the rest of the trip to Trivnelvi. I will spend the week with Nallasivan and his family before making my way to the Kerala state and than up to Goa.

I will try and keep updated after I leave Delhi,

t

More tea...more food

Tea time and Work time

Flowers

These are the huge flowers outside of my hotel...a reminder that not everything in Delhi is full of garbage.

Sikh Shopping and Sweat Shops

(L) Tailor and Sikh Gift Givers (R) Tailor in the back alley

So, our time in Delhi is winding down and we are finishing our last workshop. The gentlemen from Punjab wanted to buy us a tradtional Punjab form of dress. This turned into quite the Indian experience. We first had to go to Dr. Ajiit Singh for tea with Ram Pal Singh. Tea turns out to be a code word for feed to white Canadians as much sweets and treat as you possibly can. There was a sweet carrot dish that is still making my mouth water. I now notice it everytime I pass it in the streets.

Afterwards we returned to AIPTF Office and met up with the men from Punjab, and Suresh who is from Haryana. They took us across busy streets and into a back alley market that was streaming with people and colors and food. As well as, dogs, cows and heaps of garbage. The streets were uneven pocked with holes that had all sorts of goodies in them. It was challenge to keep together as a group. The took us into one of the many fabric places... you may be able to see the salwar kameezes stacked and piled, as well as fabric and sari material. There were men lined on either side pulling out dress after dress, other men foling and putting the fabric back. I was pulled in front of the counter and layer upon layer of material was stacked in front of me. While Suresh made fun of my "boxer" arms as we tried to find a sleeve that would fit over me pipes. He was not very kind to me and laughed the whole time I was shopping. I chose some that would fit and went to the second floor to try them on and parade them in front of an unforgiving audience... they did not catch on that it was not okay to comment on my farmer figure. I found a few that were alright..but they had a a lot of pink sparkles on them....not exactly my first choice.

The solution: we will get one made to fit you. Back to to the table and the stacks of unhemmed fabric and unbeleivable choices. They insisted on a Punjabi cut so that I would remember them. I picked out a frabric, as did Kit and the two of us traveled back into the market and down another stretch of vendors to the tailor. I have officially supported a sweat shop..and I don't mean by shopping at Wal-Mart!

The "tailor" was a box in between two shops with two sewing machines in it. We stood in side while our audience stood watching...I then had my measuremnets taken and yelled out to another man that was writing and recording fabric. We had to pick out a neck line and were told: tomorrow at five. So, Kit and I had two salwar kameez made in under 12 hours and ready for pick-up in less than 24.... they are beautiful. I am to wear mine tomorrow and I will get a picture for all to see.

These men are hilarious and sweet. They laugh and tease each other as much as they tease Kit and I. We call Suresh the trouble maker because he is always bugging the Punjab men about their Sikh turbans and beards, while the men order him around and tell him to go pick stuff up for them..this is how it is done when you are the youngest. They also tease about being unmarried and needing a husband. I have been very careful about the English languge as to not get myself into an arranged marriage. I get a little anxious when they talk about white and black being a very good mix and then laughing and laughing. Such kind men with an evil sense of humour.

The session has gotten better and I will be sad once again to see all of the particpants leave. I may never see them again and it is very sad. I have been invited to Punjab and Haryana to visit, but I will not be able to fit it into this trip.

I will be see the Taj Mahal this coming week and I may visit a few schools in the area. Between work, tea and Sikh shopping there has not been a lot of down time. I will be glad to have a break from the pace of this itinerary.

t

Valentine's Day in Delhi

This commercial day of celebration even reaches across the corners of the land and into the heart of Delhi. There are heart balloons and posters all around. I will spend my V-day still recuperating from a cold, and probably with the hotel clerks that will be knocking on my hotel room door asking if I need anything. I have figured out the three ways that they will leave you alone: do not answer the door, phone the reception desk and request some peace, or turn on a little do not disturb light next to the doorbell of the room, even then it is not certain that there will be peace. At least I know that I will never be lonely in this country.

We went out for lunch on our day of rest a couple of days ago. We were in a nice restaurant and the food was really good. Kit went to the bathroom and I was looking through the Lonely Planet India book. I was trying to avoid eye contact with the Indian guy that had sat down at the next table. He made me jump though, when he finally tapped my elbow and said with a very Canadian accent " Can a take a quick look at your book?" I started to laugh and apologized to him... I just wasn't expecting that accent to come out of him.

His sister and him had been up t0 the Punjab State to visit their Mom and Aunt and had gotten stranded in Delhi for 3 days because of the weather. He started laughing at himself when they started asking us for things to do in Delhi...two Punjab Indians asking a couple of very white women for tourist advice in India. It was a good chat. I realized in the short time I have been here that I was avoiding eye contact with everyone! Including some Canadian trying to boorow a map!

We are struggling with the group of participants we have right now. The six day Leadership development is based on the premise that the participants have had the five day PDP. THis is not the case. Many have never heard of the strategies we are using, and do not speak English... it has meant that we will have to combine different elements of the different workshops and we end up improvising and changing some of the itinerary and material we are using. Some brain work and a few tap dance moves, a few spins on my head and voila! We have ourselves a workshop.... I can honestly say that after this experience I think I could do a workshop in my sleep in any language. :)

The male-female cultural boundary has been interesting this session as well. The majority of participants are younger males with varying needs: show-off their extensive knowledge ( which really is not that extensive), refuse to ask a question or speak in English in fear of looking dumb, and consistently compete for attention. It is the scenario at tea time that Kit and I will have 7-8 males encircling us. Today, however, was a new experience, one of the men asked me to talk on his cell phone to a friend of his. I took the cell phone and was interrogated by a woman on the other end...she informed me that Srimohan could not speak English very well and wanted to know all of this information about me. It did make me laugh. It gave a whole new meaning to third party communication. It could be worse, I could have a group of particpants that wanted absolutley nothing to do with me!

This week will end and then we will have evaluation meetings to go through. I hope to make it to the Taj Mahal in Agra next week before I leave for Tamil Nadu. I also want to go to the Mahatma Ghandi Museum here in Delhi. But first, before we do the tourist things, we will have the Indian shopping experience: Gulshan is this wonderful woman that works in the AIPTF office and she is taking us shopping tomorrow. It should be fun.

t

A Monday in Delhi

I cannot say that I am overjoyed to be back in Delhi. It is a huge city and we are staying in the government area of town. It is where all of the embassies for different nations are. In other words quite boring. One must take a cab to get to anything interesting, even to use internet. The hotel itself is nice. Hotel life in India is an experience. In the morning and at night there a is a man that comes and prepares the bed. Meaning the comforter is taken off folded and placed in a cupboard. The sheets are retucked and folded down. I mentioned to Kit that even though I have been here for some time now, I am still not used to the sheer number of people watching my every move. While the man was preparing the bed this morning, I went to make a cup of tea. before I could put my hand on the kettle he had scooped it away and wanted to do it for me. The same is true in the restaurants, someone to hold the tea cup, someone to pour it and another to ask if there is anything else that you need.
I realize that I should be lapping up the luxuary, but it essentially feels more like an invasion of privacy. As was the case in Kolkata, one needs to make very clear what is and is not an appropriate time to come knocking at the door with anything from sheets to fruit trays. The special treatment is time consuming, and money sucking... especially when it is things that I would just rather do myself...I am quite homely in the fact that I can make myself my own cup of tea haha.

I have been suffering from a head cold and it was made worse by the loopty-dos the airplane made on the landing. We were caught in some bad weather that made my ears scream. Delhi has recieved quite a bit of rain and the temperature has dropped. I am not at this point going to complain about the cold (particularly because I am aware that there has been some nasty weather at home) but it is cold by Indian standards. Kit and I will be quite happy if it stays this way for awhile. It is still quite Canadian standards warm,

t

Bay of Bengal

I took a picture of the Bay of Bengal with Dr. Ajiit Singh, Kamola and Nallasivan. It was our last stop on our tourist trip. We finished our time with Kamola with a nice Indian meal: Masala Chicken, Lentils, Papadums, and special prepared Prawns in a sauce that was very tasty.

We have since made our way back to Delhi.

Konark Sun Temple

One of the wheels of the chariot(r) One of the entrances into the temple.

The Konark Temple is open to all, there are some Hindu temples that do not allow non-Hindus to enter for religious reasons.

The Konark Sun Temple has a unique history. A temple that is a tribute to Surya the sun God. Built like a chariot with wheels pulled by 6 giant horses. Much of the temple is under reconstruction and so many of the horses have been removed and are being worked on. The wheels are significant.. because they are built as time pieces. Ancient sun dials that are so detailed they can tell up to the minute because of the little notchesof each wheel.

I know this information becauseKamola took us there on the last day in Bhubeneswar. What he did not mention was that he hired a guide to give us the “7 day tour” versus the one hour tour. I do not think that I am old enough or mature enough to have had the “7 day tour”. The guide went into extreme details about the architecture of the temple and the reasons for each sculpted area. This temple was a procreation tribute. Meaning that it is where most Hindu would come for an ancient version of sex education. The guide took us through every sculpted Kama Sutra statue ( hundreds). There was no getting away from him. He would keep yelling at Kit and I “Madam, madam..please please!” Which in translation, meant we had to stand very close to him (he insisted on being a close talker) and we would get every detail of every statue while I was trying to keep a straight face as he emphasized the English words that he knew well...and he knew quite a few very well. He was about 80 years old and only had 3 teeth.
By the time Nallasivan, Kit and I were done, and the guide had left us, we were crying we were laughing so hard. We had barely held it together during his talks. Nallasivan emphasized that it was the climax of our trip to the Orissa state.
In class we had just gone over five year action plans with the leadership teams from the states of Orissa, Bihar, Jharkhand, Assam and West Bengal. Kit last comment was that she would expect to see my five year action plan. I told her that I think I needed the five century plan to go over all of the material our guide had shared.
On a serious note the architect of the temple was stunning and sad at the same time. The 120,000 workers worked day and night to complete it. They were threatened that if it was not complete in 15 years (please keep in mind there was no heavy duty machinery to lift the highest sculptures and stones to the top…sand would have been used), all 120,000 would be killed. The fine detailing and the ingenious time pieces are marked by marble sun goddesses that indicate the times of day (sunrise, midday, sunset) Each sculpture has a different expression and symbol. Kit told me that at the Taj Mahal, the archictects when they were complete their work would have their thumbs cut off. This was to ensure that they would never replicate their design anywhere else.
Every beautiful piece of history has some tragic story behind it. Kamola is an amazing host and friend. We had to say good-bye to Nallsivan last night, it was very sad and emotional. We will be heading to Delhi today. I will try and organize my other flights when I get there. There was another bomb in the Assam state and all trains have been postponed in and out of the main area. The bomb is nowhere near me but it was on a train, and the Canadian government is not advising train travel in India at this time. So please note I will be flying to Tamil Nadu and Goa. Flights are fairly reasonable and I am getting some assitance from AIPTF

much love,

t

ps.no picture of complete sun temple... have to get some pictures from Kit

Tim Horton's India Style

I pass by this tea and coffee stand when I send messages home. At night it seems really scary but during the day the men are friendly easy to drink tea with. In the jars are different sweets and treats.

I would like to have taken pictures of the sand pit party area, but it is too difficult in a number of ways:

The little kids will come and paw at you asking for money. It tears at a person's soul. There is a part of you that wants to give them every thread on your body and every penny in your purse. But the reality is that if you give one child, one thing you will be swarmed and it opens up a complete bee hive that is more painful than a few tugs on the arm by a rag clothed street urchin. They are persistant and will stay with you for blocks. The whole time you have to avoid eye contact and just keep a steady pace and a steady hand on your valuables. I often wonder if I will crack, I cannot express the damage it does to a person's mental state.

But there is joy in watching the complete innocence of half naked children building sand castles in the middle of the busy sections of Bhubeneswar without ( it would seem) a care in the world.

Another area of the street is the tin box building industrial area and then you will pass into the rooster row. Giant hand-made baskets made from bamboo weaving encase chickens and roosters and are there for sale. A living chicken market that people barter at. It is a mosaic of everything that keeps your senses spinning...

t

Arranged Marriages and the Caste System

So today I was educated about the history of arranged marriages and how it works in the caste system. The want ads for both brides and grooms are arranged by caste in many of the major newspapers and it was very unclear how the whole thing worked. The caste system has different names and categories in different states of India. All of the paricipants in the workshop are marrried by the arrangements made by their parents, including my friend Nallasivan. He told me that there was a time 30-40 years ago that the husband and wife were not to meet each other prior to the wedding. In fact if it occurred they would be punished severely. Nowadays things are a little more lenient and he admitted to making arrangements with Meena to meet her before their arranged marriage. He did say that int eh more traditional states this practice was still quite serious. When parents go to choose a wife they look for good health, level of fitness, mental health and if they are homely...which has a completely different meaning in the Western world. Here homely means that they have strong domestic characteristics, so it is really good to be homely. Another quality was a good singing voice..at this point I was thinking that I would have been unmarried for a very long time if I was raised in India :)
The highest level of caste is the Brahmins. Another caste is the Pillays and at the lowest is something called the Scheduls (I am trying to remember all of this so it may be a wrong in some parts) I was amazed to find out that it is okay change legions (Hindu, Christian, Muslim) but it not okay to marry from another caste. In fact a Hindu Pillay can marry a Christian Pillay but they cannot marry a Brahmin from either legion (or we would say religion) The untouchables ( scheduls) have since changed their lowly positions in some ways. They at one time were only allowed to the worst jobs and now there are Scheduls holding political positions.
However even within each caste their is a hierarchy. It is very complex.
Nallasivan was trying to explain some of it to me, and he promises to make a visual for our next India Education session. He confused me with names of participants: he said that by their names you can tell what caste they belong to. If they have a pre-fix in their name it indicates Brahmin status... but depending on the look of a person their name determines their legion or their caste: for example there are two men with the last name Singh. To an untrained eye the name looks the same and we may assume some sort of relation. I was informed that for one man it indicates legion to the Sheiks and the other man it is the evidence of the Singh caste that exists.
I did sit down with Kamola and he shared his Brahmin status and we also were introduce to a bride while she sat fully decorated in an elaborate bhindi and with hair and special sari... the bride can haven as many as 5 different saris during the wedding days...
Love marriages are only about 1 percent in India and the rest are arranged. The culture is changing with moe global influence, but the mentality behind marriage is very different than Canada. I will write more about the Brahmin ceremonies when I have time.
And I am still learning about the caste system... there is a lot to learn,

t

Welcoming Gifts And Going Away Gifts

A plate of treats and the flower garlands that are our gift at the airports.

Anda Thank-you gift we recieved on our last day was a hand-woven shawl that was very delicate and beautiful.

Nallasivan, Kit and Me

Workshop Team Photo. It will just be Kit and I in Dehli :(

Ram Pal's plans and running the guantlet

I am at a computer that can upload pictures. So I am choosing a few from Kolkata's Women's conference. And I will also try and get one of Nallasivan and Kit. I will be visiting Sivan and his family in Tamil Nadu. Kit has explained that when the Tsunami hit Sri Lanka and Tamil Nadu she had called and called to make sure him and his family were alright. His family was on higher ground, but many of the chilldren and teachers that he knew were not as fortunate. He i here for a few more days and then he will spend three days on a train returning to his home. Because of my limited time, I am going to fly part of the way. There have been a few bombs on the Indian trains and it is not being advised as a form of transportation at the moment. And, asmost of you know there will be some bomb, or disaster or government coup and my family will hear about it before I will! Which means I will be travelling and my family will be fretting which is never a good thing.

The other factor in my travel plans is that the AIPTF President got word that I am staying on for a few weeks in India. He has taken it upon himself to plan my itinerary. He is a very tall and traditional man and he has treated me very well. We have been having some difficulty with the PD coordinator...it is very difficult to determine if it is cultural (women in leadership roles versus male ego) or if it is language or something else. Either way the communication barrier had to be forged and Rampul Singh has been with us for a few days. The participants revere him. He does not come very often (once every 2-3 years) and the respect for him was overwhelming from both the men and women.
He is getting my tickets and hotel arrangements together for me, and I won't have to negotiate flight plans and places to stay along the way. It will truly be a treat to just travel without having to do the leg work.
The only area I left to my devices is Goa. I am doing a Yoga retreat there and will want the extra time to look into a dive site out of Miramar or stay at Ashiyana for a few days longer. I am told it is quite touristy and will be easy to manouver in. India is not an easy place to travel in. I have learned that it pays to have Indian guidance in areas of travel, eating, shopping (there is always two prices..Indian prices and foreigner pricing) Ihave also learned that you have to be careful of the words that come out of your mouth. There is a sayin in India that translates into "Guests are like God". If you mention that it is nice that there is AC in certain places, soon they will only take you to places that have AC. If you say you love the butter masala chicken..you will have masala chicken every day for lunch ( okay..so there are some really nice benefits in being a guest in this country..the butter chicken masala is to die for, however I just do not want to know the fat content!) Kamula and his people have been very hospitable and sweet. They tease and tease, and I laugh..even when I am not really sure what they are teasing me about.

The ratio of men to women on the streets is extremely skewed. For every 20-30 men there is one or two women. The other night when Kit and I walked home, we were approached by so many that we got a little testy. Most only want to speak English, half of them blatantly stare out our chests and the other half are probably just shocked to see two white women walking amongst them. Kit calls the walk home: the gauntlet. First we have to pass by a food market, then we have to cross two streets that are at the end of a round about, and then we must cruise by poop and pee alley... which is really an overpass over some train tracks. We are not sure which is worse, daylight when the urination is done right in front of you and you can see the mounds of poo and garbage in the street, or night time when you cannot see what you may or may not be walking through. The last part of the guauntlet is the sand pit party area. This is a large sandy spot that has clothed and naked children playing at all hours, it is entrenched at the end of poop and pee alley and guarded by groups of men playing cards on blankets. The children will start following you and yelling the English words they know while the youngest of them will start crying and pointing... I think a little scared of our skin and Kit's white hair. They are not dangerous but they can get a little annoying.

And last but not least are the dogs, and cows and goats that wander up and down the streets, sometimes lying in the middle of the road, not really belonging to anyone, and not really caring when you have to step over them to avoid getting hit by a motorbike or a motorize rickshaw that is honking incessantly and asking you if you need a ride. Oh the oh so sweet times had on the streets of India! They are the things that make you appreciate the luxuries of home.

I will try and put a few more pictures up on this site,

t

Bhubaneswar and other Tales

Okay..third time is the charm… I have been trying to write a little blurb about the trip from Kolkata to Bhubenswar and it has been difficult to get onto the site…in fact when I did get through and had almost finished a power outage erased the whole thing.
Some may be angry. However in my new state of enlightenment, this is not as big a deal to me anymore. Now, getting caught in an elevator when there is a power outage is a much bigger deal. In fact being caught between floors, plus 32 degrees, by yourself in the dark, and having a little Indian man yelling to me in Hindi..which I believe he was asking are you in there miss? And me yelling back..YES! Can you get me out!! This is a much bigger deal than losing an e-mail I suppose. Needless to say, I am now trying to save all writing and I am currently taking the stairs versus the elevator.

I did make it out of Kolkata though, and while checking out I had an entourage of men waiting for a bakeesh. I was still a little cranky after sleeping with all of the lights on to ward off lizards, and after I had two more knocks to deliver sheets that I didn’t need in exchange for bakeesh, and the general garbage and urine odour of the city. So needles to say, Kit and I were not in a very giving mood. We ended up waiting for the two lovely little women that arrived to take us to the West Bengal State Teacher’s Office (Sari wearing, cell phone bearing women leader representatives. The cell phones had ear attachments that clipped into the folds of their sari: technology meets traditional dress) and ignoring the line up “helpers”

The custom is to be greeted by 20-30 people and one will wrap you in hand-made wreathes, necklaces, bouquets of fresh marigolds, roses, jasmine etc. (to which you are ever watchful for stray biting bugs) and then you are welcomed in to sit and rest and have tea and a snack for a about 10 minutes. Once you have rested they will continue on to the next part of your commitment. In our case it was to speak to the women of Kolkata at their women’s conference.
We had traveled through dirty garbage strewn streets with the ever beeping and merging dust and taxis, rickshaws, bicycles and lorrys. We had walked down cow manured and urine stained streets and we climbed those stairs that were slightly warped and were greeted by 80 women in brilliantly adorned saris seated crossed legged on the floor. It took your breathe away. Different colors, all ages and stunning in every way, it was very, very powerful. That is India in the only way that can be described: love and hate, power and poverty, and pure beauty amongst dirt and despair…unbelievable India.

We flew out of Kolkata and were greeted in Bhubeneswar by 20 people and were adorned with flower necklaces that were a welcomed sweet smell. We were interviewed by a gorgeous Indian woman and Camera man ( They were stunning whereas we were a little disheveled and smelly at this point) But we once again dust covered and all were celebs in the paper and on TV.

We are now in a nice Hotel (Hotel Sishmo) with a real shower and AC… as mentioned above the power goes out quite frequently and there is a little bit of a hike up the stairs after the elevator incident but it is comfortable. The workshop is busy and the participants are very appreciative. It is humbling when they call me Tanis G (a term of respect).
When they are honouring someone they will kiss their hand and then touch their hand to your feet. There are many that will raise their pressed palms to their forehead in welcoming and thank-you. The Engligh is better than it was in Mizoram but it is still challenging because they all speak different dialects.
NallaSivan is from Tamil Nadu and he has been explaining the two language groups of Aryan and Sanskrit and why Tamil language is so different than Hindi. He will be leaving us at the end of this week. I will be very sad to see him go.
He has invited me to his home to meet his wife and daughter Vidia. I think I will make my way there after Delhi. I have started practicing already…no meat just veg dishes, which are very tasty. Most of the people in India are vegetarians and you will always be asked if you want Veg or Non Veg. Sivan is quite humorous about it. A tea was given to Kit ,and a fly dove down into it…he shook his head and said “Non-veg tea”. I personally prefer non-veg tea!

Kit and I have risked a few limbs to find this internet spot. The caste system is alive and well on India streets and unfortunately pedestrians are on the lowest rung, in fact even the cows and goats have higher status. Every type of transportation exists on the busy streets of this city and it is nightmare to cross. Merge and move in between motorbikes, rickshaw bikes , regular bikes, cars and trucks and hordes other people. It is an adventure every single day.

I am finishing here to go out and brave the streets, it is sometimes more tiring than the actual teaching. There are open markets and loud beeping and a variety of smells..both good and bad. However there are blues skies, clearer air, and it plus 30-34. Life is good, if not a little warm at times. Especially mid-day workshop time! But there is always tea to cool me down :)

hope all is well at home,
t

Bhubaneswar

Kolkata ended on a beautiful note. In a room full of colorful saris. I will write more when I can find a better computer.

But I am safe and sound in Orissa state.

Kolkata

We made it out of Mizoram on a prop plane ( less visibility needed for take-off). We have landed in Kolkata ( Calcutta) and we are here overnight. A One Day Woman's Confernece is here tomorrow and we have been asked to come speak a few a words. Kolkata is everything I expected. and a lot less. Within 5 minutes, we had beggars asking for money and we were hassled about luggage and money. It is called "Bakeesh"...literally bribing them to go away... and even then it doesn't always work.
The hotel we are at has zero lighting and lizards ( in Kit's room) It is her turn because while packing last night I had to excavate a few cockroaches that had found a home in my backpack..gotta love warm weathered countries. So for those of you braving the cold of home can be tranquilled with the thought that Canada has less creepy crawlies than most hot weathered countries..including India.
The downside to the hotel we are in, is the incessant nature of the help. They bring the neccesities of the room up one at time... toilet paper... sheets... drinking water... And with each new item there is a tip expected. The nasty part of it is they don't wait for one to answer the door. I almost got caught with my pants down. I was trying to change from my cold weather Mizoram clothes to the muggy clothes of Kolkata... In this country it would be more of a shock for him to see my legs than anything else I suppose.
We found this cafe in order to send word that we made it out flying from Aizwal. Kit had called the STF to find out about ground travel and we were give a big Fat No... not safe for two white women period. It is shocking to hear becasue I have felt more invaded in the last few hours than I ever did in Aizwal (the unsafe place) haha. After the confernence we fly out to Orissa and begin the leadership program on Monday. One night and then onward to a smaller and hopefully less smelly city. The mosquito infested waters also smell considerably like foul sewer. I hopefully after teh women's conference will have something better to say about the forlorn place.

Eswarin and me/ Houses in Aizwal

Eswarin and me! An amazing man and leader. I am blessed to have met him. (R)

Houses built out the sides of cliffs with little supports to keep them in place. (Hundreds of houses are built like this) (L)